Difficult Times

My best friend

Last week’s Friday Favourites was the perfect way to prelude to the event I’ve been trying to deal with for the past couple days. Last week, my cousin, one of my best friends, passed away in a car accident. We were all completely blindsided when we heard the news. I guess that’s how it is; with death, no matter what happens you will never be prepared for it – no matter how it happens.

Although I didn’t see him everyday, or spend all that much time with him, due to the oceanic distances we had to deal with, we were quite close. And I will be forever grateful for this summer, having spent some time with him, making some fantastic memories. But I will never forget those long talks we had so often, and the ‘Happy Birthdays’ we gave each other, and even those times we complained to each other about trying to get our lives together – thank goodness for social media.

I still think that over these past few days that my head hasn’t fully grasped the fact that he really is gone. I feel like everyone is moving around me and I can’t move forward, I’m just staying still, not knowing what to do next. He was that someone I could tell anything to – and I am continuously wondering how I will be able to move forward without him. I think it’s definitely going to be the hardest part, knowing I won’t have him to turn to when I have a bad day.

I don’t look forward to months to come, as there’s nothing that stings quite like the ache of missing someone who’s gone. All those little moments I know that I would turn to him for are going to be the hardest to get through. I’m going to miss him, but will never forget him.

-Vanessa

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One Reply to “Difficult Times”

  1. You wrote that so beautifully..tears for your pain:( No one person grieves the same as another. Time doesnt heal the scars death leaves on us, but we learn how to move forward, and moving forward in death is the ultimate in human strength. xo

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